The Artful Nomad: Nude Housecleaning: Keira Cleans

Photographed by KMann Photo

The summer after my freshman year of college, I was back under my parents’ roof, taking summer school classes, in need of a job, and completely unable to bend the truth. I had discovered the nude beach, Pirates’ Cove, and spent every afternoon there doing my homework and lounging around in the beach dress code – my birthday suit. Finding a summer job proved a problem as I lacked the ability to portray myself as living back in my hometown, and no employer was keen to hire someone who would only be around for a handful of months. Faced with no other option, I created and delivered fliers to an elderly community near my temple, and hoped someone would take pity on the young Jewish musician who may have been an honors student and fully competent in re-hanging clothing tried on my frivolous teenagers and soccer moms, but still found interviews coming to a close after the question about where she studied – not the town where she sought employment.

The summer of 2003 I spent my hours not in class openly laying on the beach soaking up the sun, or dressed in crummy clothing, soaking dishes, and scrubbing counters and floors. At $8 an hour, I removed grime and bacteria from the homes of appreciative ladies, adding a bit of sparkle to their abodes and the smell of green chemical clean. For a few people, I was invited to organize the possessions of their lives, which was always a favorite task.

Visibly nude in public, and clothed while working, the idea of doing both certainly crossed my mind.

Photographed by MartiniVision

When I returned to Southern California for my sophomore year, the idea stuck and I searched around craigslist and newspaper for ways to combine my propensity to clean with my natural comfort being nude. Hired for Randy Housecleaners (horrible pun intended) to clean homes while wearing a one of several French maid inspired thongs (not to be confused with the crotchless underwear I just discussed), a bow tie and heels of my choice, I went home with a collection of cleaning supplies which would turn out to last four years of cleaning my own apartment, and the notice to stay posted about my first gig. My young 19 year-old self was assured this was strictly for cleaning, and not concerned. As a student, an additional gig a week with this job would provide adequate extra cash to support my studies and satisfy my curiosity. The job never happened – they were confronted with issues about legality and intention, and soon that potential for a high paid, high exposure cleaning gig came to a close and was tucked away in my memory bank of things not yet explored.

To me, cleaning in the nude makes sense. You don’t want your clothing to get ruined by bleach? Take off your clothing. You need to use a lot of water to clean out the bathtub? Remove your clothing, hop in and now water is not an issue.

I have pursued this for an occasional photo-shoot, often upon my own suggestion.

I have also helped clean several homes of people I know, often in the nude because that is a Keira inclination. Call these examples of model photography or documentation of a model cleaning your home (varying amounts of real cleaning took place); I present to you Keira Cleans.